What are the 3 Magic Words?
Friends! A recent and quite simple discovery opened my eyes to an easier viewpoint of life. Better put, our words hold more power than we can imagine…
You may guess this discovery came from….oh yes, a BOOK!📚
Check out the cover:
Please Sorry Thanks: The Three Words That Change Everything by Mark Batterson
I bet some of you are familiar with author and pastor Mark Batterson from his church in Washington, D.C., National Community Church. (www.national.cc )
Mark’s also authored twenty-three books and I bet many of you have read some of them. One of my many favorite books of his is Praying Circles Around Your Children. (I reviewed this a while back)
I picked up this book because I enjoy Mark’s writing. Each part includes five chapters: There are 3 parts, one for each of our 3 magic words: Please, Sorry, and Thanks. The chapters are short and are filled to the brim with beautiful Scripture to expound on Mark’s points. His down-to-earth style makes you think he’s right in the room with you, talking to you about these three magic words.
This book will appeal to guys and gals for all of you book clubbers out there…or just for your very own self! My goal for this post is to offer you a few tidbits from Please, Sorry, and Thanks so you can decide if you want to learn more…
From the very first sentences found in the Introduction, Mark delivers the bottom line of his book:
“If you want to change your life,
You have to change your words!”
He adds, “For better or worse, our words can function as self-fulfilling prophecies. They have…the power…
…to bless or to curse,
…to heal or to hurt,
…to give life or to cause death.”
A favorite Scripture Mark quotes is Luke 6:45 which says,
Well, I’ve got good news for us readers, Mark tells us, “In the pages that follow, we’ll explore the
Psychology of please,
The science of sorry, and
The theology of thanks.”
We get more than one science lesson, for certain, and they are fascinating…We also learn about givers and takers. Mark shows us something Frances Littauer did in her book, Silver Boxes, years ago suggesting we use our words as gifts. Givers give good gifts, they use good words, they build one another up.
Soon after the science lesson on sound and voice (don’t miss it!), we learn about Professor James Pennebaker who created a “software program called Linguistic Inquiry and Word Count.” Along with the takers, we see where those who use personal pronouns like I, me, mine, my, and myself are most often used by CEO’s of companies. These folks are usually extreme takers.
I found this highly amusing as we all know folks like this who truly believe, “It’s all about ME.” Conversely, President Harry Truman said, “It’s amazing what you can accomplish if you don’t care who gets the credit.” Hmmmm, that’ll make you think!
We also get to see examples from the Bible— I love how Mark includes many for us, beginning with King Saul who began well by building an altar to God, but didn’t end well when he traipsed down to Carmel and built a monument to none other than himself. (1 Samuel 15:12)
This sentence is huge and will help us consider our usage of pronouns in the future:
Mark reminds us that “King David didn’t assume the throne without his 37 mighty men and the apostle Paul didn’t complete three missionary journeys without the 29 friends who got honorable mentions in Romans 16! (Look up the 29 and while you’re at it, try pronouncing their names…) In other words, we need help to accomplish certain tasks…and it usually begins with “please.”
Now we’ll learn two fun facts which will I pray will tease you enough to go grab this book:
In Part 1, on the “Psychology of Please”, Mark suggests something super easy to do: Smile. Did you know it’s been proven that “a smile changes the tone of your voice?” Think about that for a minute…
Ponder these staggering statistics: Regarding the science behind smiling (wouldn’t you love to be a researcher!?!), “Smiling takes twenty-two facial muscles, while it takes thirty-seven muscles to frown. Save yourself some energy, and smile!” (Don’t miss six benefits from smiling.)
Consider this: “Studies indicate children smile approximately 400 times per day while adults smile, on average, 20 times a day.”
Yes, well you know I can’t resist showing you our grand angels. Some were smiling while others were about to have a melt down, but we won’t worry about that. From left to right you’ll see: Henry, Mills, Ford, George, Claire holding Baby Mary Abbott, and Charlotte. This was taken in Michigan this summer on a wonderful family holiday.
Back to that stat: Friends! Why in the world would we smile 380 times less than our children? I believe, sadly, this stat is pretty true just from observing our grand angels. They are almost always happy (unless someone whips a toy out of his or her hand, perish the thought). I try to remember to pray to find the wonder in the wandering when we’re with them…Regardless, you can tell how thought-provoking this book is…
In Part 2, on the “Science of Sorry”, we’re whammied with another flabberglasting stat:
“Did you know that the average child asks 125 questions per day, while the average adult asks 6! Somewhere between childhood and adulthood, we lose 119 questions per day.” Ouch! Now come on, folks!
Mark asks us, “How do we recapture the holy curiosity of childhood? By taking a learning posture in every interaction.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson said,
I love that quote—it makes me think of not one, not two, but three of my dear friends and mentors who have all turned 80 years old. They are still studying the Word, some are still teaching Bible studies, some are still working! They know they still have a lot to learn and in turn, their infectious, teachable hearts affect us in the best of ways.
They’re a visual of Proverbs 27:17 which says,
Finally, Part 3, on the “Theology of Thanks”, is my favorite part. It is loaded with ways to be more grateful, more thoughtful, more intentional, more worshipful—many of which are super simple and you find yourself more than once saying, “Oh, wow, I can do that!!”
I won’t give any more away since we’ve already talked about pieces from Parts 1 and 2, but let me just say, you will be thankful for the section on thanks just to be a wee bit repetitive. Don’t miss it!
Now you know how we like to close, “Run! Don’t walk, to your nearest bookstore and grab Please, Sorry, Thanks: The Three Words That Change Everything.”
‘Til next time!
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